Feel like it

I was kinda busy lately. Really?! Was I?! Nah..I'm just assuming. No, honestly I was partly busy. What's happening to me?!

Seriously, I was really partly busy to write a post slash article but now, obviously I'm not anymore and I feel like writing again. Something just popped into my mind and it just feels good to get to know more about the writer in me. It's been a while and I miss writing. So what happened? A lot. When I say a lot, it's as many as gumballs in a candy machine. It won't probably fit in here and most of them are boring and I don't want to kill somebody with boredom. Maybe a little sneak peek to cure curiosities and since that is the case, brace yourselves for my whines and rants!

I am hooked to Scrubs and I am falling in love with Zach Braff which is ridiculous because it would be the greatest miracle if he and I would go on a date and marry, but who knows? Nothing's impossible. Ugh! Dream on! Anyway, the one thing I like about Scrubs is that behind those funny scripts are hidden lessons which are logical and intellectual mind buglers.  I super like it and in relation to that, thoughts just keep on popping in my mind too!  What an exercise to the remarkable human brain.

Two things really triggered me to write a post which are "some people are way too conscious about what other people would say" and "some are too conceited to think highly of themselves when they are not half the person they think they are."  I oftentimes say that I'm beautiful. Does it count as being conceited? Nah, I'm not really serious with those.  Geez,  don't believe everything I say! But back on track, I sure am a liar if I won't admit that I was self conscious and was conceited.  As a young adult and maybe becoming a mature individual (still in question), I've realized a few things. That living in a world full of lies , pretenses, and hiding behind the mask are crap!  That trying to live with somebody else's expectation is like  wearing a costume for the sake of getting an award but you know you're not comfortable and you don't deserve it. Did I compare that right? I don't know. I'm babbling again. I don't really know their reasons anyway. I'm still figuring out more important things than bother with their miseries that only they can help themselves.  

Gosh! Is this me? I've been writing about mature stuffs on this blog. Now I can say I'm a grown-up! Hahahah! Cheesiest shit I've written with the inclusion of myself in the picture! Yikes! It scares me! LMAO! Better get back to Facebooking!

Phat Flats

Friends are like shoes..

Sometimes I kind of link friends to shoes. Pretty, sophisticated, gets ugly or becomes valuable from wear and tear. Now, there are different kinds of shoes. My ideal pair are heels. They're sexy, and beautiful. It stands out in the crowd unlike the flats. Simple and nothing extraordinary.

At first, you select your friends. You select the heels, the ideal ones. Eventually you realize that mostly, ideal is equal to superficial. After hours of wearing one, your feet aches and you find out its real motive. True friends for me are more like flats. Though they are simple and doesn't stand out, they go more than skin-deep. They are one of your comfort zones but doesn't stop you if you want to go out of your shell. Wearing it for hours doesn't hurt but you know that it's always there to protect your feet from the cruelty of the roads, stones and thorns, then you appreciate the real beauty of flats.

True friends are flats...

I dedicate this post to all my friends and to those who are worthy to be called friends in celebration of Friendship Day!

Again

Long, hot, stressful day it was. I was tired physically. I am tired still, not physically. Is it really meant for me? Am I destined to become one? Because I don't want to become one. Is it about stability? I like that but nothing is stable. It's how you make out of life.

I want to see the different angles of the so-called "cityscapes." I want to escape from this prison cells called poverty and innocence. That might save me from poverty but innocence? How about inexperienced? I have this feeling that staying here is like building a wall between my own smalltown and the big city. And I don't want to hate my hometown because of it nor hating "it." It's payback time, I know. Part of me wants to pursue and go deeper as a sign of my eternal gratitude but becoming one is like chaining myself from fulfilling my dreams. For fulfilling what I really wanted.

As I've tried to start planning the design of my stepping stones to reach my dreams, it comes blocking my way.It always does and then just leaves me, them, us hanging. It confuses me yet I sometimes think that maybe I was really destined for it. That fate had long finished my story and just waiting for it to be published.

Whatever happens, I hope I can make everyone happy whatever HAPPYness means.

For Augustus

So here I am again on my writer's block, thinking about something to write. A lot of mind buggling stuffs going through my hard-as-a-rock head. Anyway, what happened in July? July was unhealthy!

1. 
   
   First, everyone at home got sick. Damn that was. Ate first then dad got coughs in which cancer sticks were to blame. Mom followed through. The doctor said it was a pinched nerve. Then, I got a cold coupled with headaches and fever. I refused to take meds and insisted that the healing power of water is immeasurable. It did'nt fail me and then my younger brother.
2. 
   
   Now, I'm rich as an Arab Prince.  Why? I've got millions of coin marks on my legs caused by insect bites. Grrr! For two decades, I've been taking care of my legs and in less than a month, the two decades have been a waste. Well, that's how life is. Where's the fun in perfection right?
3. 
   
   Lastly, my favorite pet dog died. Sad, but he's dead. There's no sense in crying over spilt milk. 

Well, oh well. I'll take note of the motto "Prevention is better than cure."

July's still the same, financially. "I'm still broke" eventhough I was paid for an article I wrote for my blog. The problem? I can't cash it out but I wont go further into that, maybe in due time. Job? Still a question I can't answer. Though I followed their wants, advices, and I guess I did my best.

And as I look forward to ending my relationship with writing for a while, $$$ walked past me. Who can ignore that?! I've been waiting for that opportunity without me calling it. So my plans have changed and decided to take a shot hoping it's not a scam. Besides, there's nothing to lose, well a little bit of my effort but at least it will kill my time and I'd prefer taking a risk than do nothing. In the end, it's just a matter of winning and losing. Losing but at the same time learning. It's still a win-win on my part. That's what I call positivity!

I'm not the sort who relies on horoscope when it comes to managing my everyday life but July was my month of desperation and depression so to speak. So I kinda peeked into my "mysterious but successful" future and saw that money's on the top list for August. Nothing to worry about since it's a positive prediction and because of that, I'll be doing my part to get those cold hard cash! As I've said, I can't still answer any questions about job. When I'm speaking of a job, it's the real thing and my intuition tells me that August is not yet time for me to commit to a real job so I'll stick first with the $$$ I was talking about earlier.

I also had and still have a fair share when it comes to emotional depression but if I stress my self thinking over and over about it, I'd go crazy, unfulfilled, and worst, a trash. It's better not to talk about it 'cause I know everything will be fixed in due time. As they say "everything ends up alright and if it's not alright, then it's not yet the end. So so true!

I better end this rubbish of mine and suprisingly as I scrolled, this is the longest post I've made on this blog. What a record!